How to be a Pro-Gun Slacktivist
A good Pro-Gun Slacktivist needs to be as efficient as possible with their time, and actually getting things done takes too much time.
Thanks to the internet, it is extremely easy to become a full time Pro-Gun Slacktivist. The goal of a Pro-Gun Slacktivist is to complain the loudest about the anti-gun efforts, but to give the least amount of effort possible to combat the anti-gun movement, while giving the appearance of being a full time Pro-Gun Activist.
Sign lots of petitions
The easiest way to be a Pro-Gun Slacktivist is through the signing and sharing of petitions. By sharing a petition, Pro-Gun Slacktivists are able to obtain the appearance of putting forth actual pro-gun effort, while doing extremely little.
It doesn’t matter that President Trump has ignored all of the petitions on the Whitehouse Petitions website. It doesn’t matter that Congressmen and Senators don’t keep track of petitions to change their votes. It doesn’t matter that the media largely ignores petitions. With 30 seconds of time, a true Pro-Gun Slacktivist can get the satisfaction of helping the pro-gun movement without actually having to do anything.
Congressmen and Senators don’t need to hear the opinion of a true Pro-Gun Slacktivist. The only people who need to hear the complaints of a Pro-Gun Slacktivist is their family and friends on social media. If a Pro-Gun Slacktivist can get enough likes on Facebook, then that’s good enough.
Call Anti-Gun Activists mean names
Everyone knows the best way to change someone’s mind is to insult them as often as possible with as many creative words as possible. It doesn’t matter that the actual statistics and data are on the pro-gun movement’s side. Who cares if many, if not most, Anti-Gun Activists are not aware of the recent CDC Study from former President Obama shows that guns are used 300,000 times a year in crime but are used 500,000 to 3,000,000 times a year in lawful self defense.
There’s no need to take the time to research actual firearms statistics and use them when it’s so much faster to just insult Anti-Gun Activists at every turn. Insults, not data and reason, is how to change someone’s political beliefs.
Never call your representatives
Calling representatives takes too much time. Who has a spare 5-10 minutes these days? Stranger Things Season 2 just came out! A Pro-Gun Slacktivist has already signed a petition that elected Representatives won’t see, so there’s no need to do anything further.
A Pro-Gun Slacktivist in a generally anti-gun state has it even easier. Those Pro-Gun Slacktivists can say, “My Representative is an anti-gun Democrat, he/she won’t vote for a pro-gun bill even if I call them.” Even though there’s plenty of instances of representatives changing their vote when enough people make their voices heard.
Don’t vote, especially in state elections
Since a good Pro-Gun Slacktivist doesn’t have enough time to call their representatives, who has half an hour to an hour to drive to a local polling station and go vote? Claiming to vote, without actually voting, once every four years for the President of the United States is just enough work. Doesn’t matter what the local elections look like.
Just like calling representatives, Pro-Gun Slacktivists in anti-gun states don’t need to go vote because their vote doesn’t count. Even though there’s plenty of instances of anti-gun Representatives being voted out or even recalled, that won’t happen this time. Besides, with an anti-gun representative, that makes it easier for Pro-Gun Slacktivists to complain.
Don’t join Pro-Gun organizations
Pro-Gun Slacktivists don’t want to commit their time, so why should a Pro-Gun Slacktivist commit their money? Even though it is possible to join a pro-gun organization for the cost of eating out once or twice, why bother doing that? It’s easier to just complain about the latest thing the NRA said and do nothing to change it or swell the ranks of a different pro-gun organization.
Don’t take new shooters to the range
Remember, Pro-Gun Slacktivists are all about being efficient with their time and money. There’s not enough time or money to call Representatives, vote, or join pro-gun organizations, so there’s definitely not enough time to train up the next generation of pro-gun activists or convert people on the fence to becoming pro-gun. Taking a new shooter to the range is by no means a good use of time. Instead, it’s better to complain again once or twice on social media.
A good Pro-Gun Slacktivist needs to be as efficient as possible with their time, and actually getting things done takes too much time.
Incase it wasn’t abundantly obvious, this entire article is satirical. I am calling out the many Pro-Gun Slacktivists in the world – the people who complain the loudest about losing 2nd Amendment rights, yet do nothing to enact positive change.
Please, CALL YOUR REPRESENTATIVES and urge them to vote against anti-gun bills.
Written by Brian Purkiss - always a student, sometimes a teacher.
I don't consider myself a competition shooter - I think of myself as a performance pistol shooter. I am all about performing at as high of a level as possible. Towards that end, I am obsessive about learning how to perform. I spend a lot of my life learning from the best across the entire firearms world and even into other areas of performance and other sports. I am a USPSA Carry Optics Grandmaster, currently working towards my second GM title in the Open division.
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